The Journey of a couple of budding Pick Up Artists

Monday, July 24, 2006

Fundamentals of attraction

In the beginning, it is important to assume attraction. Gauging a girl's attraction level is a waste of time because all you have in the beginning is your intuition. From experience, I am certain that it is ALWAYS safe to assume attraction. Gauging is only good for management or maintenance purposes because in the long run, you have more information to make rational judgements. What is more relevant in the beginning is your attitude and attraction towards her.

But what is important is that you MUST do your part to justify attraction assumption. You MUST be the price, you must know what you have to offer and why do you deserve that attraction. You cannot make excuse or unreasonable reasons for this. It must be genuine, something you truely believe in. (This is partly related to jerks and assholes' ability to pick up women - they think they are the best thing that happened to a girl) Only by knowing what you've got to offer that it make sense to assume attraction. Using this mindset, you are calm, you are confident, you are relaxed, you are being yourself - All the attractive traits.

The dynamics goes like this. Now, you've set up the scene that she is attracted to you, you are giving her a chance to sarge you. (Most people will be interested, if not attracted to others, especially those who they've just met. Another factor is defensiveness, which I will discuss later). You will have to push her sarging as early as possible, the more she works, the more she tries, the more she is going to be attracted to you. This is simply a universal law. It is self fullfilling because the more they work, the more they are going to be attracted to you and the more they are attracted to you, the more they are going to work on you. (always find the self fullfilling phenomenons). This is absolutly important. One of those critical factors that MUST happen. The key to succeed in this is to be highly receptive - everything she do or say is her expressing herself to you. Understand what they are saying to you in the context of her revealing herself to you and interpret it as a way to sarge you. Then, escalate - you slowly allow yourself to be sarged by her, each time she does something right, you are more attracted. By doing this, your attraction is the reward for her work, for her to be genuine, for her to supplicate to you.

The nature of your attraction must be genuine, and it must NOT be superficial. This can happens very quickly and early on in the interaction (within the first few seconds of seeing her) - you need to be able to "see" a person for who they really are instantly. This means that you need to build the ability to sense the vibe and energy of a person, you need to be able to pay attention to the details, her gestures, the way she carry herself etc. You need to have a strong, accuriate intuition about the person, size them up immediately. Second, you have to be able to see them for who they really are, you need to be non judgemental and appreciate them for who they are. If any of your reward doesn't make sense, or it reward her talking fluff, you are heading down the wrong path.


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