The Journey of a couple of budding Pick Up Artists

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Field Report: Helen

Everything you do is an experience, everytime you throw caution into the wind, you learn. This must have been the 6th or 7th date with Helen. I think I've talked to Jimmy about this and I mentioned I am going to give her a last try. So I did - not only I tried, but I gave all that I had for it - I tried to like her. But its just not happening. Like Doc Love said - you date her interest level, and you marry her attitude and integrity.

Looking at it from this point of view, her attitude is like a little girl, structured, unimaganitive, and is not quite aware at my level. This definitely doesn't spark me in anyway. Not funny, not intelligent, the only thing she had going for her was her interest level and that she is rather cute. My assessment of her interest level is at about 70% or something, and I guess she is about a 5 to me. This barely warrent a good interaction, on the way, there were many red flags:

- Donating money to people she doesn't know what it is (especially when they were wearing army uniforms)
- Only want to eat things she couldn't cook at home (rather than whatever she feels like)
- Checking maps, called too many times to confirm the meeting
- All conversations revolved around daily happenings, as fact, a whole series of do's
- Doesn't listen! Waits for her turn to speak about her shit
- Don't know how to connect, neither conversation nor dancing

Made me cringe time and time again. I really tried to have a good time but it was average. I did not have fun, I cannot get her to seduce me. Maybe I am just not inspiring her, whatever it is, its not working. Time to drop it - friends only. So, Jimmy, shes all yours! HA HA. Oh, she is pretty cute and I will get her to put on her office suit for you, lol.

What I am worried about is - am I picking on the little things because I am afraid, or that I really sense that she is not really interested. Maybe it doesn't matter, I remember Doc Love's definition of a red flag is something that makes you feel "something is odd". There are heaps of this feeling but I can't quite make out what it is most of the time. I hope I am not being too protective. Interesting lesson. Its great to be able to see this, hopefully, the more I do this, the easier it is for me to see these things.


  • At 4:47 PM, Blogger Jimmy Foxx said…

    Thanks Mimesis! lol! Ever heard the phrase "one man's trash is another man's treasure"? It's harsh, but quite often true. It'd be interesting to actually meet her someday, after all you've told me about her. Those red flags are a concern, though, and you were right to notice them and bring them up.

    Man, there's a VERY important lesson that I have learned in the past 6 months: You've GOTTA TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. I have failed time and time again by not listening to myself, which led me to ignoring red flags, which ultimately led to a sudden and sometimes very painful ending. Doc Love once said "you KNEW this girl was trouble to begin with, and you KNEW there were obvious red flags, but your ego and insecurities kept you in there, and now you're in a world of hurt". Scarcity mentality is often the biggest cause of this self-induced ignorance.

    This happens even if you don't really like her that much at first. Ever had this happen to you? You hang in there, and the weeks and months go by. Her interest level is high, so things seem easy enough, despite the red flags. And besides, you're getting sex. But slowly your interest level rises, and you get somewhat deeply involved with her. And then, all those red flags you ignored earlier begin to rear their ugly head. Then you're dealing her problems, and it becomes a carppy co-dependant relationship that requires a lot of hard work. THEN her interest level drops below 50% - now you're screwed! She's treating you like a second-class citizen, and you are committing AFC behaviours all the time.

    So, even if you're not that interested in her in the first place, this scenario can easily play out if you hang in there. No, don't do it! Trust your instincts, be AWARE of the red (or even yellow) flags that pop up, and go with it.

    After all, if she's a quality girl and her interest level in you is over 50%, then things will be good and there won't be red flags. As long as you like her, you can sit back and take it easy... all you have to do is be a challenge and make sure she has a great time whenever you're with her, and things will work themselves out!

    Good job, Mimesis. A very useful field report!

  • At 8:57 PM, Blogger Mimesis said…

    I have to engrave all the anti-seductive behaviours and Doc Love's red flags on the inside of my skull. I cannot afford to forget them because it is so dangerous.

    Your insecurity and your ego will lure you into a below average girl because of her initial interest level. You know what I think? I think thats when it all starts to go down hill - you give in.

    That is the first time when you trade your self respect for a little bit of female action! It starts at your first ignoring red flags. It is a trade you made that will take you a no-return flight into AFC city.

    Don't go there.

  • At 8:39 PM, Blogger Jimmy Foxx said…

    Yeah, and it's another example of sticking to your guns when it comes to settling. Are you serious about "never settling"? Then get out of scarcity mentality and let the average ones go!

    I hate how I used to rationalise being with an average girl with all sorts of excuses. In reality, I was doing exactly what Ross Jeffries talked about when he said "most guys get into a relationship by default".

    Like you said dude, Don't Go There!

    P.S. cute Asian girl in an office suit? OK, I'm willing to give her one chance! : )


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